Escape To Paradise

What's a long weekend for, if not to plan a quick escape to an idyllic island paradise. For us, this is a 45min ferry ride to Ria Bintan ClubMed. Good food, great entertainment & wide open spaces to entice city folk back to Nature & revel in recreation.

On previous trips with our 2 sons, ping pong & archery were two land favourites while playing in the sea surf was everybody's. ClubMed has given meaning to the phrase, "The family that plays together, stays together."

Without ever leaving its spacious grounds, one can spend delightful hours trying out different pastimes & making new friends. Indoors or outdoors, rain or shine, day & night, there is always a Clubmed activity to keep everyone happy.

Hiking gets you close to Nature

We'd like to dispel the notion that Singapore is all a concrete jungle because we actually have a few pockets of rainforest & we're glad to show some enchanted trails that you can hike close to Nature.

Besides the usual troupe of long-tailed macaques or giant millipede crossing our paths, we've seen a clouded monitor lizard foraging in the leaf pile & a rare pangolin scaly anteater up a tree.

As Dr Jill Taylor has prescribed (see earlier post), hiking is good for our right brain. It helps us remember that we are but a part of the fabric of the whole universe. Besides, as our dear friend in Boston, Professor Lee I-Min believes, it's good for your health !

Friends Sharing Music

What are friends for ? Some say that "A friend in need is a friend indeed." For us, we would rather cultivate friendship steadily, through mutual pleasures. Like singing. So it was that last month, Francis & Huey Chin, our good friends from medical school, opened up their house to their singing pals under Teacher Erick, for an evening of food, fun & sharing of music.

And for that matter, with the children "growing up" , my wife & I feel the need to cultivate time together. Like (once again) going on movie-dates, and trying out new experiences like dancing, hiking & travelling.

A Penny For Your Thoughts

What happens when a human being (a meme machine - see earlier post on Randy Pausch) suffers a stroke, and recovers? What happens when that person happens to be a neuroanatomist, a scientist who studies the brain, the very organ that generates memes. Eureka! You gain new insights & create new memes.

Jill Taylor has lived to tell her unique story, of how her brain functions shut down one by one, the day she suffered a brain hemorrhage. And how she took 8 years to walk, talk & think again. We take for granted our ability to sing, dance & surf the Net. Imagine how crippled we'd feel with a brainstroke?

Dr Taylor, however, shares with us a wonderful revelation during her darkest moment. When her damaged left brain disconnected her from our mundane world, she was able to reach into her right brain to find a profound peace, compassion & feeling of oneness wth the universe. In her book, she tells us how to achieve that, without suffering a brainstroke.

So what's the price of a life-changing thought? Maybe a 16th century "penny", enough to buy you Dr Jill Taylor's book in today's currency :-)

The Dance Of Life

What do the book "The Dancing Wu Li Masters" and the musical film "My Fair Lady" have in common? I would think it's the pivotal role that Dance seems to play in our lives. Let me explain. "Wu Li" is romanised Chinese for life energy, amongst other things & Gary Zukav chose his poetic title to introduce the beauty of quantum physics for the layperson. On the other hand, in the musical adaptation of Pygmalion, one delightful passage about dance which I simply relish, is this : "Oozing charm from every pore, he oiled his way around the floor."

While I watched the confident senior couples dance at the Raffles Hotel last weekend, these reflections became my inspiration to blog about our dance teachers, Dr Jennifer Foo & Dr George Wong. They have been married for over 50 years & continue to impart their love for dancing to new generations of converts like us. Such a wonderful couple, they have what the French call Joie de vivre !

Celebrating Life

Come the end of the year, there's Hari Raya, Deepavali, Christmas, & just around the corner, Chinese New Year in January. It's always a good excuse to come together to celebrate with family & friends. It's also what's unique about Singapore - a multi-cultural & multi-religious gestalt.

After working hard in the office & raising the kids, what better way is there to celebrate life & our raison d'être by gathering the clan & friends for a smörgåsbord of Christmas turkey, Mediterranean salad & Chinese favourites. Then wash it all down with Chinese tea or a Tiger (beer), here's to Life !

Celebrating Our Silver With Gold

This October, my wife & I decided to celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary with a trip down memory lane - leaf peeping in New England, driving up to Niagara Falls & winding up in New York & Long Island. The weather was much better than our (wet & rainy) August trip to England & we'll let the pictures show why Autumn in this part of America is simply spectacular.

We were treated to lunch in Boston by Lee I-Min, our friend from 1991 when we stayed a year for my skin research at the Massachusetts General Hospital. Amazingly she looked as youthful as before, having become a professor at Harvard's School of Medicine & Public Health with a main research interest in exercise for health & prevention of chronic disease.

A Paradox of Life

One year ago, I visited Queensland, Australia for a weekend workshop on skin cancer. Accompanied by my wife, we decided to follow it up with a road trip to the mountains & the beaches. We had a great time; cool mountains, sparkling seas & refreshing breezes. Blessed with plenty of sunshine, it is a paradox that this tropical paradise has one of the world's highest rate of melanoma, the deadliest skin cancer.

Life is full of paradoxes; we may have more conveniences than before but less time to spend with loved ones, you can hear but fail to listen, look but do not see because our minds are multi-tasking! Perhaps it is time to slow down. Visit an old friend. Or take the scenic route.

Visit England 2008

The day after my wife's concert, we flew off to visit an old friend, Eric Maxim, in England. We first met 20 years ago while on holiday in Interlaken, Switzerland. Over the years, Eric has taught us what being a pen-pal is all about. There's something warm & fuzzy about receiving snail mail from the postman, & deliberately writing longhand instead of zipping off an email.

Now, at 92 years "young", he has shown us how to have dignity in the evening of our lives, coping as well as he has done. Sadly, he recently lost his true love, Edith, his dear wife of 53 years.

But as Randy Pausch (see previous blog posting below) told the graduating class in his "short" lecture, no one beats the "grim reaper". So may each one of us chase his/her childhood dreams & also, find true love & happiness in this (short) journey of Life on Earth.

Music & Singing

After her Kinabalu climb in May, my wife is now back with her first love : music & singing. Tonight at a Students' Concert, her singing coach, Mr Erick Guansing, created a platform for his students to share their singing passion.

There were songs from Broadway, the Movies, Jazz numbers & Chinese ballads - a potpourri which the audience loved as much as our local cuisine. And that somehow epitomises Singapore, a harmonious melting pot of many tastes.

It's also intriguing to remember Tunes as memes. They leap from brain to brain at the speed of sound. You get emotional, happy & pass it on. Reworking, remixing & in the process, creating. And they get better, for generations to come.

Tribute to Randy Pausch 1960 - 2008

There's nothing more powerful & inspiring than a man's (or woman's) last words. In his Last Lecture, he did not dwell too much on topics like deathbed conversion or herbal remedies for his pancreatic cancer. Instead, he spoke animatedly about what he did to achieve his childhood dreams.

"We cannot change the cards we are dealt (with), just how we play the hand."

Randy Pausch did not live in vain. He was a powerful Meme Machine : his messages have already touched millions of people. He will continue to live on in the minds of generations to come because of what he shares. For those who haven't experienced his memes, see & hear them for yourself on YouTube, or buy his book.

"...it's not the things we do in life that we regret on our deathbed, it is the things we do not."

"...find your passion & follow it...you will not find that passion in things (and money)...there will always be someone with more..."

Sharing the Kinabalu Spirit

Tonight, we had an evening of sharing. There were slideshows & funny videos to replay shared moments on the sacred mountain. Impromptu speeches spoke candidly of strength found on the scenic Mesilau & slippery Timpohon Trails. Despite altitude sickness, extreme fatigue & the following day's wild river rafting, it was a miracle of survival through trust & comradeship.

I see a special Meme in there; its the universal adage of " Together we stand, divided we fall. "

Sex & Culture ( Genes & Memes )

Have you ever wondered about the meaning of Life? Have you ever asked, "Why are we here?"

"To drink from the fountain of youth" may be someone's purpose in life but how can you avoid eternal pain & disease? Since we can't live forever, another choice may simply be to replicate oneself biologically thru' sex & marriage. But how about celibates & childless couples?

The answer may lie in the idea of passing on our Memes, as opposed to genes. For those unfamiliar with the term, Richard Dawkins is first credited for defining a meme as a unit of cultural transmission that's passed on from one generation to the next.

A meme can be a Tune, a catch-phrase or simply a more efficient way of doing something. To paraphrase Dawkins, "Just as a gene gets propagated from body to body via egg & sperm, a meme leaps from brain to brain via a process called imitation."

Love, Being Real & Remixing

How do toys become Real ? And (as the song goes), what's Love got to do with it ?

I'd like to quote from Margery William's book, when Old Skin Horse gave this piece of advice to Velveteen Rabbit : "Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been Loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints & very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

An interesting analogy is in "textual poaching" on humankind's great literary preserve, passed down through the centuries. It is conceived that good ideas get Reworked & Remixed. One may see it as Poaching but others may view it as acts of Loving Use.

Ethical Wills & Remixing

When my father passed away in 2004, we felt a great loss. However, while trekking in the sacred mountains, we felt his spirit moving in the mists & clouds. We also remember him through his Letters to his Sons, a form of Ethical Will.

If you read his Letters, you'll come across familiar quotes from ancient China & Europe - he talked about filial piety & dignity in old age. And yet they are made unique in his own words & exemplified in his lifetime. Call it Remixing.

I'd like to paraphrase an anecdote from Jonathan Lethem, "For we are all nomadic readers, poaching our way across fields we do not own,... yet adding value to great ideas & making them even better."

Mountains as Sacred Places

Mt Mazama blew its top around 6688 years ago. Snowmelt filled the resulting crater to become Crater Lake, Oregon. Just like Mt Kinabalu, the native people have considered them Sacred. No matter what religious background, one will be imbued with respect for such places. Certainly, appreciation for their environs, so different from the city & town.

One will also have respect for the weather. On Kinabalu, my wife had beautiful blue skies after sunrise at the summit, but rain & mist halfway coming down. Crater Lake, on the other hand, let us experience a last snowfall in June, 2007, creating a wonderful winter landscape that was all too transient. Enjoy the Oregon Album.

I'd also like to share that fabled speech by Chief Seattle in 1854 which was refashioned into a plea for eco-conservatism; and transformed into a poem entitled "This Earth Is Precious".

Climbing a Mountain & Cancer

Everyone will face difficulties in Life, big or small. My wife, a paediatrician, got to thinking that climbing Mt. Kinabalu, one step at a time, was somehow like conquering a Big Cancer for a little child.

So she decided to make it a charity climb by canvassing for donations to the CCF or Children's Cancer Foundation in Singapore, if she made it to the summit. Now that she's succeeded, everyone including the brave young “climbers”, will be inspired to persevere whenever the road ahead seems like an uphill climb.

Believe in yourself, and you will achieve.

The Best Currency in the World

Now that we're back home, safe & dry, it's time to reflect upon our Kinabalu adventure. I realise that although money may buy you lots of stuff; like warm hiking socks & a sturdy walking stick, the best currency to have in your pocket is not the Ringgit, US Dollar or Euro. It's Trust. Especially when you finally stumble out of the Timpohon Trail at 9pm in the rain.

Trust in your travelling companions, your mountain guide, porter & bus driver. It's something intangible but instantly recognisable like when you look at the face of Leo, our little chihuahua, asking, "Will you be there for me?"

Down To Sea Level

And now, the bags are packed, we're checking out. Everyone's relieved, relaxed & ready to go Home. Time for a last groupshot !

That "Top Of The World" feeling

When you reach the very top of Mt Kinabalu, you know that "Nothing is impossible". A case of Mind over Matter. Everyone comes away changed in one way or another. And yes, there's a sense of togetherness, "We Did It."

Kinabalu, at the start of the climb

This is the group assembled at the start of the (scenic but longer) Mesilau Trailhead to the summit. After 3 months of arduous local training, everyone's looking forward to the Real Thing. Except that all along, I had decided to stay back & await their safe return at Kinabalu HQ. Doing the leisurely Nepenthes Trail instead, I felt was kinder to my poor knees.

Climbing to New Heights

Sometime in your Life, you will feel the wanderlust. Or the urge to scale a mountain. This year is Climb Kinabalu 2008. At 13,435' (4100m), it's the highest peak in SE Asia. Last year, my wife met up with old friends from school & discovered her hero in an ex-soccer star, daring to lead a second expedition up Mt K. Word soon spread & now, there are about 2 dozen aspiring climbers, from adolescents to mid-lifers, all questing for adventure.

Enjoying the View of Crater Lake

Once in a while, it's nice to slow down. Smell the flowers. Take the scenic route. Last year, my wife & I breathed in the fresh mountain air of Crater Lake National Park, Oregon USA. This area is sacred to the Red Indians. We understood why, just by being there & taking the time to drink in the beautiful vistas.

Being Real, Like Old Skin Horse

There's nothing intrinsically wrong with wanting to do Cosmetic, or to drive that beautiful Car. It's the unhealthy pursuit of wealth & outward beauty, to the exclusion of everything else, that leads some of us down the slippery slope of moral decline. After all, being Real like Old Skin Horse in "The Velveteen Rabbit" is far loftier an ambition, than wanting to be Buzz Lightyear in the Menagerie of Life.

As Time Goes By

Baby Patrick's the new kid on the block. And Sherri's grown into the little story teller.

Grandma may be slower but she's kept busy with toddlers in the house.

And so they say, it takes a Village to raise a Child.

Being Old is the Real Gold

Here is little Sherri's paw in Grandma's hand. New & Old. Symbiotic, as Nature intended. Remember the story of the Velveteen Rabbit? We will know when we become Real when our hair falls off & our joints become shabby.

How about this picture of Grandpa hugging his first 2 grandsons? See the joy in his face...

Once we accept that becoming Real is part & parcel of our Journey on Earth, only then, will we know that Olden is truly Golden.

Skin Deep Beauty

Is beauty only skin deep? Must we always yearn for perfectly smooth skin? That may be so in puberty. And maybe again in mid-life when age "catches up".

But pause for a moment.

Look at couples who have ridden the storms of long marriage. You will see beauty in their crow's feet & marionette's lines. Look at your toddler's little paw in grandma's wrinkled hands. See how contented his world is & how happy she is with young life.


There's beauty in skin aged with years of laughter & loving touch. Appearances are deceiving; wrinkles can be beautiful. Don't Botox everything.

Moraine Lake & Medicine Lake, Alberta & Lake Tahoe, California

Here are my thoughts on skin, beauty, health & life.